villain: it seems i’m holding all the cards, mr. bond
james bond: UNO!
If they don’t want me to ash on the floor,maybe they should put some ashtrays in this gym
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Oh really, Carol? It takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown? How many muscles does it take you to mind your own business
Cigarette: Hey buddy.
Me: I don’t smoke anymore.
Cigarette: But buddy.
Me: You do make a good point. Fine.
This google docs thing is lame. Whatever happened to those viruses that turned your screen into a laughing skull & shut down the power grid?
Ever noticed how fast people walk across the road when you don’t apply the brakes
me: wait for what
Ughh…7 more hours till I can go home. Oh, sorry, my Canadian friends…7 more Kilometers till I can go home. Or is it liters?
A fun thing to do would be to eat rat poison during a dinner party & then, when you die, they’ll blame the host’s cooking. Lol.
I only treason on days ending in y
There is no panic like the panic you feel when you think you may have clogged the toilet at someone else’s house.