@mybigblondelife: If they just built prisons out of the shit they package electronics in, no one would ever escape.
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@ShanaRose21: After reading some marriage tweets I'm beginning to suspect we all may have been married to the same person.
@AndrewNadeau0: The Ugly Duckling is my favorite story about how everything is okay as long as you eventually become hot.
@T_Bonezzz: CREATION OF MAN God: And as they age, they shall lose all the hair on their heads and grow more in their ears & noses Angel: Yes, my Liege
@catcerveny: Me: Dude, back off. You're totally scaring away all the hot guys checking me out at the gym. H: You do realize I'm your husband, right?