@eliserose5

If you are older than 17 and have mad love for Justin Bieber ,you are the reason whales are the most intelligent species.

You Might Also Like

@HomeProbably

I wish I had the confidence in humanity that Guinness had when they bought a 9,000 year lease.

@Kyle_Lippert

I nominate Chris Brown to dump a bucket of boiling hot water on himself & to raise awareness for domestic violence.

@13spencer

Katy Perry says that god spoke to her before the Super Bowl and said “you got this,” so it’s safe to say that god has crappy taste in music.

@JediGigi

M:$50 on the ginger with face tattoos

H: Ma’am those aren’t tattoos, they’re freckles and you can’t bet on a 6th grade spelling bee

@Havish_AF

I hate when someone is killed in a movie. While normal ppl watch the scene, all i’m doing is try to catch the dead character breathing.

@iwearaonesie

[leaving Whole Foods]
wife: Can you believe we only spent $100?
*bag rips*
*apple falls out*
me:
wife:
me: Well that was a waste of $100