@SondraDeeMe: If you see your ex, wrap your hands behind your neck and pretend you're making out with someone. That'll show him you're still crazy AF.
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@flashember: [Wildebeest being lowered Mission Impossible-style from a helicopter to graze the grasses of Buckingham Palace]
@DrDogMD: NURSE: *bursts into break room* A man just came to the ER with a broken bone thru his skin! DR DOG: *looks at other Drs* I'll take this one
@LaceyNycole: Him: How much do you love me? Me: A bit more than pizza. Him: Me: But not as much as coffee.