the 5 girls who will absolutely ruin your life:
julia if you’re reading this bring my goldfish back
If you take your antidepressant prescription to the pharmacy in your wedding gown while sobbing incoherently, they will fill it instantly.
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I made a book review bingo card. Critics are hailing it as ‘a remarkable achievement’.
4: *hops in my lap* Mama, look at my picture!
Me: Love it
4: See green
4: And blue
4: And red
M: *flushes toilet* ok, hop up.
*pronounces woah like Noah*
My mom just told me she’s been watching that “Game of Thongs” show.
Gawd I hope she’s just saying it wrong.
Fetty Wap’s full name is Fettuccine Wireless Application Protocol.
America. Where assault weapons will protect your family, but two dudes getting married will destroy your family.
My grandmother’s name is so Italian you need both hands to pronounce it.
Why is it always “I see you drank all the beer today!” instead of, “Oh, honey, that was so sweet of you to help clean out the refrigerator.”
My youngest child is choosing to drop out of homeschool and instead pursue her B.E.D.