It’s actually rude to shoot anyone, messenger or not.
If you’re looking for an experimental couple, we’re trying a new chicken recipe tonight, hit us up.
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Judge: I sentence you to 10 years
Defendant: Well I sentence YOU to 20 years
Lawyer: That’s not how that..
Judge: [being cuffed] DAMN YOU
Hey, parents of an only child considering having one more, know that I just split an M&M in half.
I’m getting concerned that Beyonce never told those single ladies to put their hands down and now there’s a bunch of unfed cats out there.
Been starving for a man’s touch for months and I finally have a date tonight. How do I get out of it
If a rookie ever pulls a gun on me and says “stop or I’ll shoot” I‘ll simply smirk and say “not with the safety on”, causing him to check and giving me the time I need to grab a gun, put on a bullet proof vest, do some elite training/conditioning, fire off some practice rounds,
Bad weather is My way of temporarily punishing you. Bad climate is your way of permanently punishing you.
Okay this is a quality meme
Baller is short for ballerina