@alucardsdream: If zombies ever do attack, I'll just skip coffee that morning. They'll leave me alone because they'll think I'm one of them.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@TheToddWilliams: [post-abduction] ALIEN 1: Be not afraid, human. We will do you no harm ME: Will I like Area 51 if I haven't seen Area 1 to Area 50? ALIEN 2: Let's grab a different one
@Lhlodder: A mom just told her kids the park is closing so they would leave without throwing fits. Another mom overheard and said, “Uh-oh, the park is closing! Gotta go! So I said, “Everyone’s leaving! Let’s follow them out!” We all winked at each other and got in our cars. Teamwork.
@Carbosly: Right about now, family members all over the country are realizing the Starbucks cards I gave them for Christmas are empty.
@SoulYodeler: Yes I am 45, male and love cats. Recently I posted a selfie. It could be worse though, right? Hello?