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@BlacB: "I'm in your city".
me: ok. enjoy it.
@causticbob: What's the difference between a guy wearing a bullet proof vest and the English football team? The guy would survive the first round.
@daemonic3: Doctor told me I only have 6 months to live, maybe 12 if I get enough likes on Facebook.
@5hael: All I need to know about you is defined by whether you ask for a cup or a cone when ordering ice cream
@ShortSleeveSuit: [throwing out the baby]
Me: Oh shit, my bathwater!
@OtherDanOBrien: [Dog Restaurant]
"Is the Book Report any good?"
"How's it prepared?"
A 9yo stayed up till 3am to finish it.
"Ooh, I'll have that."