@Elizasoul80: Michael Phelps just won another gold medal for taking the quickest bath.
@briancthayer: *mom puts a gummy vitamin in my mouth while I yawn*
Mom, I'm 36. *chews it up, swallows* Adults are supposed to have 2 though.
@Birdhumms: Brain: If we leave now we'll be on time for once.
Body: Ten more minutes then.
@lovemydogduck: My nephew had his first day of kindergarten yesterday. I told him he gets to go back tomorrow. He said No thank you. I won't be going back.
@Adar79Angie: I sat down beside this guy in a diner, every time he went to take a bite of his sandwich I'd say nomnomnom. He left. Making friends is hard.
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