@RCKruseKontrol: I'm not trying to sound like a conspiracy theorist but isn't a little suspicious these hurricanes keep happening in alphabetical order??
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@thestlouisan: My grandpa slept in snow in the Battle of the Bulge & I'm considering throwing out this cup of water bc it has some tiny floaty things in it
@mrjohndarby: [taking immortality pills] wife: but wont we get bored of eternal life? me: dont worry, we'll have each other.. *we swallow the pills* me: i can still see it in your hand
@nerdreign: Body language can be so subtle that only an intuitive person can read your mood. Body slams, I have found, are far more direct.
@ABostonTwit: Walk into the club like whatup OWW Walk into the mace like what DAMN Walk into the sword like wha *dies* *flunks gladiator school*