Songs with lyrics like, “We don’t need sleep,” why are you rebelling against naps? What are you–four?
I’m perfectly fine with kissing frogs to find a prince…But I draw the line at kissing snakes.
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The types of jars
I think at my age the next tattoo will be more responsible like a dragon across my back but doing his taxes.
Most of being a parent means saying “Great!!” when your kid insists you watch him perform an unidentifiable skill.
Her: I heard you like to break the rules
Me: [chewing a mouthful of silica packets] you heard right, babygirl.
Me: “I have octopus like reflexes.”
Person: “Don’t you mean cat like reflexes?”
Me: *squirting him with ink* “Nope.”
Me: Why is a squid throwing away all my stuff?
Calamarie Kondo: What
It’s always good to tell people to “stay safe” during a distaster just in case they didn’t know.
Bottom line: parenting interferes with my ability to be lazy.
Until you can’t kill a spider with an e-book, Print media will live.