please tell me that when we defeat ISIS they will have to become WASWAS
‘I’m really excited about the Pixar cowboy figure I got for my birthday.’
‘Not quite that excited.’
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Cell division, explained:
I used to play the triangle in a reggae band but left because it was just one ting after another.
Google Maps says it’s a 29 minute walk, but where’s the secret calculation for the long-legged and impatient?
Got rid of all those dangerous Tide pods when I gave them away on Halloween.
No officer, Vodka and I were hanging out and this car decided to join us.
GUY SPIDER: (after sex) omg I can’t wait to see my son
GIRL SPIDER: *putting on bib* yeah, about that..
I see you’ve blocked me on all social media sites & moved house without leaving a forwarding address
Baby, does this mean we’re on a break?
[to baby crying for 45 mins]
WHY ARE YOU CRYING YOU LIVE HERE FOR FREE
Who’s the man who, with
just the slightest touch-
gives you chills and makes
you tremble with anticipation ?