@CelebrityChez: Imagine creating a lifetime of mystery for someone by breaking into their home and replacing all their family photos with pictures of eggs.
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@d_duhwit: *worm surgeon beside worm in hospital bed." Doc:" Surgery went good but the floor was slippery and long story short you have a son now."
@ItsAndyRyan: My printer: Sorry, can't print this out – I'm very low on magenta ink Me: But I'm literally printing black text – there's no red in it My printer: Feed me magenta or you get nothing
@yonewt: Every member of my family is polite & courteous which I why our pantry has 17 boxes of cookies that contain exactly one remaining cookie