@Kiirkland: Imagine you playing dead and the shooter yells out “tickle all the dead bodies”
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@HomeProbably: Fish look like they're constantly being surprised by something.
@shutupmikeginn: Using the domino's pizza tracker app seems like a great way to carjack someone you know isn't going to put up that much of a fight
@AndrewNadeau0: MY WIFE:We named you after our favorite songs. You were mine LAYLA: I love that ME: And you mine THEME FROM DUCKTALES: No, yeah, I figured
@MrSpoonicorn: i hate it when i eat a slice of bread and it grows into a bread tree in my stomach
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