is the plural of judas judasses or judi
You Might Also Like
what’s really going on
[Folding my wife’s laundry after 7 years]
Pile 1 – I have folded these correctly
Pile 2 – I think I have folded these correctly
Pile 3 – I have no idea how to fold these
Pile 4 – I don’t even know what these are
Donald Trump is probably the closest we’ll ever get to electing Eric Cartman president.
Parents be like “i don’t have a favorite child” then use one of your siblings birth dates as a password
Has anyone tried putting all the Wordle answers together to see if they spell out a warning
This dude forgot to put tomatoes on my sandwich. Thanks, “artist”. Now I have nothing to pick off.
My family went camping & left me home alone, like I’d be missing out.
Oh please, don’t leave me home with electricity & running water.
Sound smarter than you are: end words with “eaux” and sentences with “if you will.” If you’re pissed, “quite frankly” adds a nice touch.
[Christmas Party]
*opening my gifts*
Well well well, if it isn’t the festive scarf I gave you 3 Christmases ago
lowe’s manager: so…you want a job. what department should I assign you to?
me: hmm…how about the mirror aisle? I can see myself working there.
Guy about to invent archery: I want to stab that guy over there but I don’t want to walk.
I made the cutest little Easter baskets with leaves and fronds. My neighbor is still wondering who sawed off the top of his palm tree.
“Paper beats rock, Charles!”
I’m about to go for a run as soon as I text all my enemies and let them know.
boss: have you been here all night?
me: [jumps awake at my desk] uh, yeah.
boss: trouble at home?
me: there’s a seagull standing on my car
Who called it a licence to own small amphibians and not Permit the Frog.
Anyone who thinks children are not just tiny criminals has never been shaken down for a dollar at 6:30 am
Okay this nightmare isn’t going to realize itself
I see all my neighbors out there mowing their lawns and I wonder if they’d come do mine also.
Mistletoe, poinsettias, and holly berries are all toxic plants that can potentially be harmful to humans and pets.
Here’s a great idea, let’s decorate our house with them for Christmas!
Yes my dude
Someone please help me convince my boyfriend to hire people to paint the inside of his house instead of doing it ourselves we’re only 80% of the way through one room and I’m already thinking about how I can fake my own death and move to an island until it’s over
Received a DM from a dude who claimed that he knows me in real life.
I can’t guess out who he is, probably I have to kill my friends until I get him.
Netflix subtitles be like “[speaks Japanese]” well okay baby but what they saying???
[séance]
Medium: I feel a male presence coming through
Me: I want to get in touch with my late husband
Medium: His name is Tim?
Me: No, Luke. May I use your phone? He was supposed to be here 20 minutes ago
We’re investigation reports of little piles cack in all the flower beds around here. You match the description of somebody we’d like to talk to.
I like how adding a little OJ to a glass of champagne says “I’m classy” instead of “It’s nine in the morning and I have a drinking problem.”
Sometimes marriage is about love & compromise other times it’s about letting the garbage get so full & seeing who will cave first.
You’re not doing Britishness right unless you’ve apologised to at least three inanimate objects in the past 24 hours.
“You’re acting weird.”
First of all, I’m not acting