@poopiest: It is 2022. Everyone has bought a pair of beats by dre. Doctor dre chuckles, his mind control device is ready
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@MarlonBrandNO: [Trapped on a Island] *Message in a bottle* "Please send help!" *Gets message back, months later* "Linda invited you to play Candy Crush"
@gorrdano: How bout I hold a toaster over you while you're in the tub, and you tweet something that doesn't make me drop it.
@Chumpstring: COP: the word booty is painted all over ur neighbor's house ME: that's awful COP: he has video of the culprit ME: that's even worse isn't it