@mattgallo123: It's funny, when I walk into a spider web I demolish his home and misplace his dinner yet I still feel like the victim.
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@Phoebetate: Shout out to my body for reminding me that, while I'm too old to have the tiny waist of a 15yo, I'm not too old for a pimple on the forehead
@SortaBad: me: [trying to sound cool] I'm in a punk band cute co-worker: that's cool. What the band's name? me: [looking over desk for ideas] Inbox(29)