Call me faithless, but I just can’t believe three guys would travel that far on camels to throw a baby shower.
It’s not the holidays until I see two minivans with red noses lock antlers over a parking space at Target.
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Apparently Hooters is a great place to meet single dads on a Sunday.
Why doesn’t Ed have a girlfriend?
childrens alphabet books are the only thing keeping us from forgetting what a xylophone is
Dating tip: Men find mysterious woman alluring, so keep the spark alive by occasionally acting like a lunatic possessed by the devil.
After incorrectly spelling my symptoms at least 100 times, WebMD kicked back “Listen idiot, you’re drunk. Just go lay down”
[when my crystal pendant starts glowing eerily] hold on, i’d better take this
Quentin Tarantino + Johnny Depp = Rango Django
sometimes I question my sanity, sometimes it replies
Went to a Halloween party at the zoo, the animals were dressed as sexy people.