@Ideal_Victoria: It's official... My voice is incapable of making, "Thanks. I appreciate that" not sound sarcastic.
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@Parentpains: Weird, my coworker has bragged all day about his pending vacation and now his headlights have kicked themselves in.
@TheRolo: Not to brag, but a news anchor started following me today. She recognizes a disaster when she sees one.
@drankturpentine: ME: *falling in love with my karate instructor* how about we turn this roundhouse into a roundhome? KARATE INSTRUCTOR: *roundhome kicks me in the gut*