JASON: Oh good, this saves me some time.

You Might Also Like


I wonder if all the other popcorn kernels in the bag freak out when the first kernel pops


May I get your name? Yes, its “I’m The Only Person Here Waiting For Coffee.”


Pretty sure the neighbors are impressed with the banging and screaming they heard.

Little do they know it was just me chasing a spider.


I texted my husband about all the sex I’m expecting for my birthday and accidentally sent it to my MIL. She just responded that she’s already made other plans that day.


No thanks Audi; I get all the uncompromised luxury I can handle by driving whatever car my wife thinks makes me look the most married.


Dropped my Ant Farm and now the rug is like the first 30-minutes of Saving Private Ryan.


[cop car]
Buzzfeed Guy: It’s okay I work for Buzzfeed
Cop: You robbed 10 banks
Buzzfeed Guy: You wouldn’t believe how much I got from #6!