@WheelTod: Just got your text from last night: you need to cut the red wire first to stop the countdown.
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@zachreinert03: I think marriage is probably like having a business partner. No that's not true, probably weird if your business partner takes your kids
@AssOnHat: interviewer: so mr long legs what are your qualifications for the position of web designer spider: haha, mr long legs was my father, you can call me daddy
@VanVeenB: Tried pushing her against the wall to kiss her like all you guys suggested. Put her head right through the drywall. Goddam cheap motels.
@Eden_Eats: Poor Luigi when his parents were all, "This is Mario, we also call him 'Super Mario'. And this Luigi, we also call him 'Player 2'.