Just imagine if Usain Bolt was your father and you were trying to run away from a beating.

You Might Also Like


Anjelica Huston got married to the inventor of autocorrect and now her legal name is Ageless Ice Houseboat.


sorry i’m late, i have terrible time management skills and zero perception of distance as it pertains to speed of travel


I’m so sick and tired of my friends who can’t handle their alcohol.

The other night they dropped me 3x while carrying me to the car!


Me: I have a hemorrhoid that looks like Don King.
Customs agent: I meant do you have any goods to declare?


Door says push.. I pull.. If it says pull I push.. I’m ether a hardcore Rebel or I need glasses…


God: make alcohol really fun

Angel: haha ok

God: but it makes them stupid

Angel: i dont know if-

God: and if they have too much they die


If the new Instagram logo makes you upset, wait until you hear about child soldiers in central Africa.