So I misread the ad
Apparently, The Cartel doesn’t NEED a drug snuggler
Just made a voodoo doll of myself that I’m about to beat some sense into.
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I was thinking about blocking the Suez canal but that ship has sailed
Mean The Same Thing.
Unless You’re At A Funeral.
[checking bag at the airport]: yes, that is indeed a bag
Religious places never have free WiFi because no religion wants to compete with an invisible power that actually works.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just beat the room for being black.
*drops mic, gets beat by security*
I wear a mask in public, not only because the vast majority of doctors say it’s safe and an effective way to combat COVID-19, but also to hide my second chin.
A psychiatrist is just a friend you pay to listen to your problems because your other friends are tired of hearing about them.
Stages of beard length:
1.) sexy stubble
2.) sea captain beard
2.) prisoner of war beard
3.) homeless person beard
4.) wizard beard
*throws keys at nearest sober person*
DRIVE ME HOME PEASANT