I hate it when adults try to relate to youth using slang. Guess that’s what makes me a woke bae.
Kanye West named his kid North. Drake Bell says he’ll name his first kid Taco. I think Jessica Biel should name her kid Batmo.
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If you have 6+ numbers after your name as part of your Twitter handle I can only assume you’re an inmate & tweeting from prison.
I don’t mean to sound like a tough guy but I’ve been in New York City for almost two hours and I’ve only cried like 31 times…
Zac meets Ron
Zac dates Ron
Zac takes Ron home
(Ad for a baby)
• gently used
• can’t even kill you
• doesn’t shed
• poops on a learning curve
• goes from 0-60 in roughly 60 years
I wouldn’t want to fly Virgin. Who’d want to fly an airline that doesn’t go all the way?
Pal: “on your date, ask her about herself. Oh! And girls love a guy into animals”
Me: “how much do you weigh? about as much as baby cow?”
one time i slam dunked a basketball so good we were out of school for a week people just needed time to process
I hope that one day I am as fearless as a New York City Pigeon.
Me with a black eye: You should see the other guy – he looks amazing. I think he moisturizes.