@ElgatoEsmio: Keep reaching for the stars but get a better deodorant.
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@daemonic3: [road trip] ME: I'm hungry, let's stop and eat FRIEND: I see a 24 hour breakfast place ME: You idiot, we don't have that kind of time
@JohnLyonTweets: Your lips say no but your eyes, they say no too. And your body language, that definitely says no. What I'm saying is you're very consistent.
@sarcasticmommy4: My son said he’d do something in a minute. So far it’s been 185 days, 16 hours & 11 minutes but who’s counting.