@IamEveryDayPpl: Kids are making millions off apps and games they've created and I haven't watched TV in days because I hit a wrong button on the remote...
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@DurtMcHurtt: *rocking back and forth, trying to gather enough momentum to get out of a chair* WHO ARE YOU CALLING FAT?
@emptyheadtwo: He raised an eyebrow, put his hand down and with one eye on the table, looked expressionless. Never play poker against Mr Potato Head.
@AndrewNadeau0: If you read the entire dictionary technically you've read every book but out of order.
@BoogTweets: [at a wake] Me: *closes coffin to set my drink down* so, what are you doing after this Widow: wow