Latex inflatable trousers, don’t leave home without them.
#Harikrishnan #Menswear #LondonCollegeOfFashion
You Might Also Like
I wonder if I’ve seen enough movies to be able to emergency land an airplane
Reasons why it’s bad that Justin Bieber is retiring:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
there comes a point in every parent’s life when they consider the possibility that they might need to lower their expectations
Buy living room furniture that matches your pet’s hair because, work smarter not harder.
Young mom: My baby is 34 months
Me: Oh really I’m 407 months yeah I hope you like doing math you piece of shit
My One A Day multivitamins actually have directions on the bottle – “Take one multivitamin daily.” Hmmm
Joseph: 3 minutes BC
Mary: Aaarghhhhhh
Joseph: 2 minutes BC
Mary: STOP DOING THAAARGGHHH THE BABY’S COMING!
Joseph: 1 minute BC
Mary: JESUS CHRIST
“So hell isn’t too bad,” I say from the podium. “I just keep teaching?”
“Actually…” said a demon
“Actually…” said another
“ACTUALLY…”
My boss want to sign us up for a 401k. No way I’m running that far.
Son: I don’t like it when the house pees on me
Me: OMG just get in the shower
Birds are weird. Could you imagine if we all woke up at 5 a.m. and just started hollering at each other across the whole neighborhood?
Good thing we got these tiny handheld computers to do our yelling for us, or else we’d look like IDIOTS.
My daughter just found the dog leash and collar
Which would be less awkward to explain if we actually had a dog
How’s the parenting going over here?
My youngest just told my oldest to “GET IN THE DAMN CAR!”
The stages of sharing a vacation rental with another family are:
1. Wish we were more like them
2. At least we’re not like them
my depression: I’m sad
my anxiety: but why now I’m worried
my depression: nothing to worry about I’m sad for no reason
my anxiety: oh cool but honestly I was just gonna worry anyway
I don’t clap when the plane lands but I would boo if it crashed
my wife’s divorce lawyer: why don’t we just get them to arm wrestle?
me whispering to my lawyer: do something
My brother has been remodeling his guest bathroom for over a year. The door has been off for almost as long.
And that’s how you keep people from visiting your house.
Twenty bucks to anyone who shows up at my funeral, leans into the casket and says “You okay buddy? Do you want to go get some ice cream?”
Her: I’ve found a picture of you when you were a baby!
Me: yeah? let me see.
Her: *shows me a pic she took during a previous argument*.
[1st day as chef]
[quiet shouting grows louder as I burst into the dining area covered in lobsters]
[date]
EXPECTATION:
Me: [dazzles her with charm and wit]REALITY:
Me: “I hear the chicken is pretty good here.”
Nothing says “I m not interested” quite as loudly as showing up for a date
Boys will be boys. Girls will be girls. Koalas will be koalas. Just about everything will be the things they are. That’s how this works.
“My pleasure, doll”
“My pleasure doll”Commas can make a world of difference…
Husband: can we try some new positions in the bedroom?
Me: sure!
Husband: any ideas?
Me: [excited] sleepy sloth?
Husband:
Me: [more excited] hibernating bear?
Husband:
Me: [most excited] the lazy starfish?
Some lady brought a gaggle of pre-teens to the movie, sat them down next to us & then sat elsewhere.
I sold them all on the black market.
I wish there was enough room on TV for another show called Judge Judy, but where people just stood around criticizing a woman named Judy.
Guinea pigs aren’t real pets. You buy them when your kids are begging for a dog, but you want to make them sad instead.
I just yelled at some kids to get off my lawn. They were my own kids, but they can find somewhere else to play like everybody else.