@Sorrowscopes: Leo: You will unwrap a package of Pop Tarts and none of the corners will have fallen off. This is how you will know you died in your sleep.
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@GrowlyGrego: Wait...the "S" in ASAP doesn't stand for "Slowly?" Shit. This has cost me 27, maybe 28 jobs.
@KylePlantEmoji: A fun game you can play with someone who claims they're going on a detox diet/cleanse is to ask them to name literally one toxin they're getting rid of, and why the liver somehow missed it