@kimtopher22: Like my mama always said, "May you be in heaven a full half hour before the devil knows you're dead."
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@Reverend_Scott: "Will u make me breakfast tomorrow?" No, you'd be disappointed. "Wait-" Because- "Don't say it-" Omelette u down. "Please leave."
@yassinovic89: What if Aliens don't want to visit us because they're all women and they want us to make the first move.
@markhoppus: i appreciate the song "the boys are back in town" because it answers the age-old question: are the boys back in town y/n?
@marcia_bee: Imagine me in bed. Wrong. Wetter. Wrong again. Wetter. Wrong AGAIN! Soaking wet. This leaky roof is gonna cost me a fortune to fix!