@GoFrankGo: Look, Clinton's gonna win. US President order has to follow Star Trek Captain order: white guy, white guy, black guy, woman, Scott Bakula.
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@ValeeGrrl: Husband got excited thinking I was touching myself under the covers but I was actually just opening a Kit Kat I didn't wanna share.
@WittySassBasket: M: HEY, DID YOU REMEMBER CONDOMS? H: FFS, use your inside voice M: *whispers* did you remember condoms? H: can this wait til after mass?
@BuckyIsotope: I will be celebrating Columbus Day by setting sail for India, landing in Spain, and telling everyone who lives there to move out.