@noogscorner

Maybe that neighbor without a Wi-Fi password isn’t an idiot. Maybe he’s generous. And an idiot.

You Might Also Like

@GabbbarSingh

The initials of the Sri Lankan players read like DOS commands. MKDIR, CHKDSK.

@2tickytacky

Cop: “Do you have any idea how fast you were going?”

Shark: *eats cop*

@MaraWilson

FRIEND: Want to do Escape the Room?

ME: Dude like 90% of my life is me trying to figure out how to get out of places I don’t want to be

@EtobicokeErnie

The lottery gives you a 1 in 200 million chance of not going to work tomorrow. Tequila gives you a 1 in 3 chance.

@Cheeseboy22

Me: Is your friend coming or what?

16yo son: I don’t know. He’s not answering his texts.

Me: Why don’t you call him?

Son: I don’t know what that is.

@Travon

So sad America ranks 25th in the world in math. But at least we’re still in the top 10.

@Pork_Chop_Hair

I don’t think the water lizards run on the water always. I think it’s a “oh hey I forgot something” or “shit it’s the cops, run” thing.