We should teach North Korea a lesson and send them James Franco.
Me: did you like that movie?
Toddler: yeah but we better watch it 3 times a day for the next month just to be sure.
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Am I joking? Yes. Absolutely.
Do I also mean it? Yes. Absolutely.
JURASSIC PARK is a movie abt how just bc something is great doesn’t mean u should bring it back and it has three sequels
*leans over sink*
*splashes face w cold water*
*stares at self in mirror*
*returns to couch where my niece is playing mario kart*
best of 3
Please help. My husband just started running. He runs in jeans. With a belt. I don’t have anyone I can talk to about this. I am so alone.
stranger: you’re gunna look stupid with all those tattoos when you’re 80
me: listen pal, everyone looks stupid when they’re 80
Is Fergie totally done spelling stuff? Because “mischievous” sometimes stumps me and I’d appreciate a song about it.
Finally cleaned out the fridge to make meal planning easier. Tonight, we’re having buttered olives with mustard and baking soda.
When Doves get married in a parallel universe they release screaming humans from the cage.
Karma Chameleon is my favorite song about lizards getting what’s coming to them