EGYPTIAN KING: we shall build religious monuments. they will baffle future science.
SUBJECT: what shall we worship?
EGYPTIAN KING: cats
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In the Flirtatious Period, the dinosaurs did a hell of a lot of winkin’…
Salad tastes pretty good once you add some Nutella and throw away the salad.
Date – “I really dig intellectuals”
Me – “oh yeah? well check this out babe”
[counts to 17]
My spanish class in high school should have had a bit less
“Where is the bathroom”
and a bit more
“She was dead when we got here”.
Thanks for the holiday photo! I can’t believe your little girls are already unhappy, overweight teenagers!
Apparently, when you supply HR with a urine sample, it has to be because they requested it.
well they’re gonna sell out pretty quick!
Whenever someone jokingly replies, “Blocked,” I laugh and laugh and then go check.
Who called it Osteoporosis and not Epic Frail?