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@AimeeHelene1: Me: I'm so fat...
Him: *rolls eyes*
Me: *rolls fat*
@Playing_Dad: Major Tom: This is Major Tom to Ground Control
I'm stepping through the door
& I'm floating in a most peculiar way
GC: New phone. Who dis?
@RdrJay47: Her: I have a marathon coming.
Me: Ooh, which show?
@seamusmckracken: If you're hitting the gas every time she tries to open the passenger side door, remember, the 8th time is always the funniest.
@david8hughes: My dog: wasn't me
Me: I know
My dog: honest It wasn't me
Me: it's ok really
My dog: [chip packet still on her head] I think the kid ate them
@Jamdug: I like Horror Movies for the first 20 minutes when everyone is just hanging out and having a good time.