Peanut Butter CEO: it’s taking too long to mix it, leave it lumpy
CEO: call it crunchy
Me: oh ok then we charge less
CEO: hahaha no
Me: My blood pressure is sky high. I need to get my affairs in order.
Him: Make a will?
Me: I was thinking flings with hot men, but OK.
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NASA: you’ve been selected to spend a year on the space station
ME: wow that’s awesome
NASA: you and your entire family!
ME: oh ok no thanks