Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

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@XplodingUnicorn: My 4-year-old thinks the 5-second rule means she can eat anything off the floor if she waits 5-seconds first. That M&M was from last Easter.

My 4-year-old thinks the 5-second rule means she can eat anything off the floor if she waits 5-seconds first. That M&M was from last Easter.
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@MrSandeepP: I love how girls say that they like a guy with a sense of humour and yet you'll never find a poster of Mr Bean on their wall.

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@CGSuperJordan: On the 5th day god created the Platypus, he then said "looks cute, might delete later"

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@weinerdog4life: Watched Avatar again and long story short, can you untie my ponytail from this horse?

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@BrentTerhune: Just made a playlist for hiking. It has music from Peanuts, The Cranberries, and Eminem. I call it my trail mix.

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@BoomBoomBetty: Me: Forever young! Persistent middle age chin hair: lol nope. Muscle pulled when reaching for the tv remote: hahaha.

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