I want to meet the individual who made this
My coworker is pregnant and they passed a card around and I didn’t know what to write so I just put HAVE A GOOD BABY TANYA
You Might Also Like
There are so many people outside, and so much yelling, and I genuinely genuinely don’t know if it’s a murder or a rare Pokemon.
Jackie Chan turns 65 today and he’s still able to beat the living shit out of all us with a ladder
Three things that are certain in life~
2) Paying taxes
3) Somewhere a woman is pissed at a man ….
Boss: it’s come to my attention that someone has been eating out of the trash!
Everyone, including his pet raccoon looks at me
“I’ll have a rum and coke”
Is pepsi ok?
*hands you a pepsi and coke*
murderer: oh no i forgot my weapon 🙁
aragorn: you have my sword
legolas: and you have my bow
gimli: and my axe
murderer: omg *tearing up* you guys :’)
“GO TO YOUR ROOM AND STAY THERE”
KID: *goes kicking and screaming*
TEEN: You can’t do this, I have plans tonight
ADULT: Thank you so much
Luke: Did you get the card I made you?
Vader: I couldn’t read it. Your handwriting is awful.
Luke: I HAD TO WRITE WITH MY LEFT HAND.
*Lying in hospital
Doctor)Your back is broken in 6 places. You may never walk again
Me)At least I got all the groceries in one trip