@NYorNothing: My ex texted me today to tell me he has not one, but two dates this week. Anyone else have useless information I don’t care about to confess?
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@Black__Elvis: If I were a woman I’d probably use tampons because it seems like it would be hard to stuff a maxi pad all the way up there.
@TheAlexNevil: Me: It's time for your nap. 6: I don't wanna take a nap!! M: First off, don't talk back to me. Second, I was talking to me.
@aveuaskew: *walks into interview* Thanks for coming in today. I'm Mr. Maballsonya, but please call me Phil. *walks out of interview*
@Staggfilms: BAILIFF: Please state your name for the courtroom. SCOOBY: Scooby Doo. BAILIFF: Your FULL name. SCOOBY: Scooby Doobie Doo.