Hey, babygirl, I have ten bucks and a BOGO coupon for McDonalds. Wanna come watch me eat two Big Macs?
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Grading system for students in India:
A – Average
B – Below average
C – Can’t have dinner
D – Don’t come home
F – Find a new family
There’s been a whole lot of office Romance since I became self employed…
Never mind trying to scare me about going to hell religious people, it won’t work.
I was married for 6 years.
The Fat Girl’s Guide To The Zombie Apocalypse:
If you see me running & there’s no ice cream truck in front of me..you should run too.
The world is your Oyster.
So raw, rubbery and resembling a booger?
If Jesus came back today, hipsters would be like “whatever Jesus, the book was better.”
Neighbours kids just challenged me to a water fight.
I’m just tweeting while I wait for the kettle to boil.
So what happens if I neglect to “safely” remove the USB from the OH DEAR GOD THE BLOOD.
All is fair in drunk and war.