@RandiLawson: My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, but they stay for the intelligent discourse about Benghazi
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@AimeeHelene1: At 36, I still have no idea what to do with my hands when I'm in front of a group of people. *hands on hips* *hands in air* *does macarena*
@novicefather: A breakfast buffet at my funeral so people will be happy. But with soy bacon and chia seed pancakes so they know it's a time to grieve.
@abhorrent_wife: Sometimes I have my shit together, sometimes I eat an unidentified white substance out of my hair and am grateful when it's frosting.