@EamonToPlease: My phone just sent me an unsolicited hockey score. Aren't there Japanese horror films that start this way?
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@NicestHippo: Don't worry about choosing between a job you love & one that pays money because you won't be able to find either
@HispanicIcon: I'm so broke that if my girlfriend leaves me for another guy I swear that I'm going with them.
@ashmensch: *steps on Lego* *stumbles backwards and trips over more Legos* *throws all Legos away* *Grandparents buy more Legos for Christmas*