@_wangwe: Never ask a shepherd how many sheep he owns, I don't think he'd know, he probably falls asleep every time he takes inventory.
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@mydmac: Therapist: Would you use alcohol, food and sex as a means of feeling happy? Me: Yes, thanks.
@mommajessiec: Him: I’m feeling under the weather. DATING: I’m so sorry. That stinks. ENGAGED: I will nurse you back to health with chicken soup and cuddles. MARRIED: *sprays him with lysol*
@hazelmotes1: It seems to me that if you can afford a barrel and a pair or suspenders you can afford a pair of pants.