No quarantine has all five:
– ur partner
– balcony / garden
– quiet neighbours
– hi speed wifi
Never underestimate the power of a hug. Or a slap upside the head. Whatever works.
You Might Also Like
On a scale of 1 to ‘Maxi pad with wings’
How self-absorbed are you?
INVENTOR OF THE CLOCK: all done! I just need to set it. what’s the time?
ASSISTANT: what’s the what
Woke up this morning with a pillow over my face, hearing someone muttering “…it would be so easy…”
Whenever I order room service and the person tells me how long until the food arrives, I whisper, “If I’m alive by then,” and hang up.
Me: (after eating 12 fudgesicles)
Ok. Time to get to work.
You: You can actually buy popsicle sticks at any craft store.
Me: Don’t question my art.
Well, if it doesn’t include antidepressants, they shouldn’t call it a Happy Meal.
“Welcome, Karen, to Pants On Fire!” the game show host says.
“Excited to be here!” I tell him.
The host eyes me. “Are you?”
My forced smile starts to break. Sweat beads drip down my face, and I swallow hard.
“Light up her pants, guys,” the host orders.
Passed a gym sign that said “Have those new yoga pants been to yoga yet?” and I feel personally attacked.
Can I have the definition, please?