@mikealfredcaine: nice haircut what did you do ask him for a nice haircut & he said "no"
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@BrandandCo: I feel like Neil deGrasse Tyson would be the most annoying person in the world to watch Space Jam with
@TheCatWhisprer: gas pump: do you want a receipt? Y/N me: *presses yes* gas pump: me: *pressing harder* YES gas pump: lol nope
@imteddybless: I bumped into a VERY handsome man on the tube platform and now we’re on the train together and i can’t wait to steal furtive glances at him until I get to my stop and do absolutely nothing more about it
@bananagrvyrd: Just spent 5 minutes waving my hands in front of a manual paper towel dispenser if anyone needs someone to take their SAT exam for them.