@carebear4647: No Twitter crush. I have a twitter boyfriend who I intend to marry and have twitter babies. Then twitter divorce and take all his followers.
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@joejwest: ME: I'm heading to the shop ROOMMATE: What are you going to get? ME: [wearing a wedding dress] Compliments
@bobvulfov: DONALD TRUMP (45 minutes into watching wall-e): this film is not what i hoped it would be
@Parker_Simpson: this Holiday Inn has their flag at half mast...I'm assuming one of their guests died overnight