@squirrel74wkgn: One time an intruder broke into my house and got scared off by the old high school wrestling trophies I still have on display.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@KeetPotato: pilot: [via intercom] if you dont shut up back there i will stop this plane co-pilot: [quieter] wont it fall out the sky pilot: not now gary
@sploosk: Welcome to Insults Я Us, you sack of crap. Buy some stuff if you're not too cheap. Maybe eat out of a garbage can. You'd probably like that
@reczit: I'm afraid of people who keep smiling all the time. I feel like they still have plenty of space left for more bodies in their basement.
@Fickle_Filly: I’m at that stage in life where my bladder is at its weakest and my phobia of public toilets is at its strongest.