Lol at birds that walk places.
Spirits im in need of your help
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Seriously? Nothing in the waiting room but Highlights magazine?
[I get called in 10 minutes later]
Hold on, let me finish this article.
me: can you check my math homework?
me: is this not a correctional facility
sibling relationships are wierd.i can give you my kidney but im not getting you a glass of water.
Dear Tech Support,
I twied to puth my tongue in tha USthB port again. Canth you helpf?
Marriage is like Disneyland. Magical at first but then you realize that there’s someone else in the Mickey suit.
Millennial cop dramas are incredibly tough to write. Since we can’t afford to retire, nobody is ever 2 days away from retirement when they stumble upon The Big Case
Me: *out of breath* go on I’ll catch up
Him: *turns around to see me eating a can of cherry pie filling*
I could probably be lured into a white van with no windows with guacamole.
…or dill pickles.
…or Jeff Goldblum.
…or, hell, any kind of cheese at all.
I ain’t picky.
Baltimore’s chief export seems to be artisanal crime narrative.