@TheTweetOfGod: Out of curiosity, where were you all thinking of moving after you're done destroying the Earth? 'Cause I assume you've thought that through.
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@chris_isloi: Everyone keeps returning to the same hypothetical. If loving you is wrong... Bullshit. What if loving you is gross? That's the question.
@truegritrumble: KID:I drew you a picture! ME:What's this? KID:Our house. ME:What's the orange stuff? KID:Fire. ME:Why's the house on fire? KID:I wanna PS4.
@AmishPornStar1: Mechanic said I blew a seal... Technically, it was a sea lion, but more importantly, how did he even know?
@SortaSarcastic: What am I doing with the rest of my life? I don't even know what I'm doing with the rest of this tweet...