Summer is here! You know how I know? Cause it’s kinda hot outside. And because my panties have little watermelons on them.
I will walk by you fifty times to make sure you know I’m ignoring you.
Her: Do you wanna do it?
Me: Do what?
Her: It.
Me: What’s it?
Her: You know… It.
Me: Oh… I call first player.
Her: Wait, what?
If you wanna be classy, just use the word “whilst.”
Example: I know I just met you, but can you cum on my face whilst I pinch my nipples?
Psychiatrist is just a fancy word for mood critic.
If this guy doesn’t stop staring at my boobs, well then, I’m just gonna have to wear this shirt more often.
If we put aside our differences and work together, I truly believe we can come up with a few more alternate spellings of the name Britney.
Watching two cows do naughty things to each other in a bush. They been reading the Farmer Sutra lol
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck knew his existence was futile & all his loved ones were going to die one day?