Dear every guy that works out excessively, the sun is out! NOW is your moment! It was all worth it! Take that shirt off and walk around!!
My husband suffers in silence louder than any person I know
The kids of today have no respect. They’re rude, lazy and swear to make themselves look big and coolnnNothing at all like us…
Whoever said money can’t buy happiness didn’t like things as much as I do.
So, when does this adulthood thing start then?
To do list:nn1) Kill the fly in my room. nn2) Try to snort multivitamins.nn3) Practice Hadouken in mirror.nn4) Kill the fly’s loved ones.
I once challenged Snoop Dogg to a rap battle and the loser had to change their name.
Woke up this morning with a pillow over my face, hearing someone muttering “…it would be so easy…”
How do you know you’re allergic to cats if you don’t even eat them?
“I love you” can be the most beautiful words you can hear from someone you truly care about, next to “I got this round.”